Now It Can Be Said

Hi Sweet Stranger
Now that it can be said
All these god forsaken years later
Do you think that at the end of days
I am
What I were
All those years ago?

That which was unsaid
All those years ago
I do not have it in me
To put in words

As if it were easy
This insanity
Ask Enwright
And he will tell you

Raj
From Life in a Multiverse

Lets Talk

They Say Distances disintegrate
When people talk.
We tried did we not?
We made sounds like shrieks
And invoked storms and thunder
Within our widely spaced out lives
We talked... and disintegrated

Often, looking back I believe
We should have shared some more days
Of silences
And the storm would have ebbed
We would have been together again.

Desperate in our distances
Confined in our closeness
I wish we were like winds
One within the other

The trees would have done the talking.


More@ Life in a Multiverse

Of the Sun and the Sand

Of all the long journeys I have undertaken, the ones that I remember are those where I travelled with friends. I have not come across bad folks in my life, only some were thoughtless. I have been thoughtless and selfish too, so such people are great levellers, they help pay me for my bad deeds.

One such was when the Sun went to play with sands on a lonely desolate beach. I remember how the shorelines warped in time and it was difficult me to know where the sky ended and where the sea began. There was too much light, one could see clearly, but then, there was little to see. And when it was time for the night to fall, white light gave way to yellow despair. Later, they tell me that there was blood in crimson sky.

Later, the sands frolicked with the waves. The party had moved on!

That Smile of Yours

I remember throwing a 5 rupee coin into the Godavari. It was a long journey and it was a long bridge. Everyone around me threw coins, and I did too. The moment the coin left my fingers and hurtled into the big river, I missed it. It was almost as if something very dear was suddenly torn away.

Do you know what I had wished for? Remember the time we were out for an evening at the handicrafts park, the one that had a huge swing? You are crazy about swings, and you are crazy about sands. This place had both, and you loved swinging in the twilight, hair let lose, your dupatta catching the wind.

I wished for one more evening at the Park with you.

Time Flies

It is summer in Patna. The gulmohar trees have lost their mind, in full bloom they light up the afternoon sun into an inferno! The roads are dusty, straight out of any of those Bihari gangster movies. The women are still the fullest sharpest and prettiest among all women. I met a couple of old acquaintances, they look the same, only I look older. And what is it with these small towns, they still remember my escapades from twenty years before, of guns and goons and girls? Wish I had not been so Bihari so young, I might have grown up with so many more choices of things to do.

Yes, I did go to the places we went to, to the tree under which I kissed a girl the first time in my life...god, it had to be you. They now have a mall! A big one, the kind we see in big cities, with lovers escalators and pretty housekeeping chicks.
Twenty years is too long a time in time. Much has changed and so have we. The bel-ka-juice tastes the same, only my mother looks much older. Sister Suma still lives in church inflicted penury, dad still does social work and I still miss you like Malda Aam. Time flies to some place unknown to you and me. Someday we will catch hold of this tyrant and take him to the place where we kissed first.

Lest You Forget

There was a time when time stood still
When time slowed down to a trickle
And floated around you and me like pollen grains
Each full of promises of destinies untold
Full of stories yet to unfold

Then you spread wings
And flew into the summer winds
Time moved on
Faster than ever before
As if it were trying
To make up for lost time.

Seasons have come and gone
And you and I have caught ourselves different boats
But far ahead I see the sea
And there again some day
We shall together be.

Forever

How long will you live Raj?

Forever Princess.

No really, how long will you live?

I was serious the first time babe, I will live forever.

Dog you are, can't you give a straight answer?

I did. You remember the time my grandma died, a part of me died with her. I know that I will never ever get over that loss. And then when I thought really hard about what I was going through, I realized something very important. I realized that every time I lose someone dear to me, a part of me dies as well. I know that in this long road to death, parts of me will die along the way. By the time they put me to fire, there will be very little of me left to burn ;-)

But you said you will live for ever?

I did. My grandma lives for as long as there remains a soul in my family who remembers fondly of her, and then she lives in the stories I will tell my children and my grandchildren.
For as long as they who love me live
For so long shall I too.

I love you Raj, do you?

I do Princess.

And you will tell your children about me?

I will, I promise.

Raj,... Then I too shall live forever?

Yes my love, you too shall live forever.
Forever.

The Dark of the Night

You would not have walked with me Had the nights been not so scary And your nightmares All so real for you. I would not have held your hands...