Slow Death

There is a futility in loving you
I know that you grow in lonely places in me
And will eventually
Kill me.

There is a futility in loving you
Like moss that grows in my village well
Beautiful
But treacherous, you see.

There is futility in loving you
Like arsenic
Green and lifeless
Someday I shall be.

There is something about you
Around you
And in places and things and sounds and stains and smells of you,
That softly weighs on my soul.
It’s like a background score
From a movie
Time forgot.

There is futility in loving you
And as I watch myself softly sink
I remember how you smelt
Of Victoria's Secret
And other crazy things.

 First published in Indian Sahitya, Feb 2017 Issue on Contemporary Indian Poetry

3 comments:

  1. Often we are attracted to the people that can hurt us the most... yet we continue to follow through... I have wondered if it was all worth it myself... ;)

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  2. I can feel the loss in this, Rajesh. Maybe it is time for the speaker to pursue a more fruitful path?

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  3. futility may lie in staying with.... in clinging on. But love can never be futile. For after years u'll find it made u a better person.

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