Works of RK

You still sit close to me Its only an additional inch away And nobody sees this except me. You still look at me Like you always did With some longing and loads of love Only, now your eyes hold mine for a micro second less. And when you talk to me now I am reminded of the time When you did not have to measure your words Ration your laughter... You served pure sunshine. Wedges in our hearts Are so difficult to live with. For they exist in places Where no stranger has ever tread.

I read Eli Shafaq's Forty Rules of Love a couple of months ago. It helped me understand a little more about the fights that wage in me. How I experience life has a lot to do with who I am. I am often surprised at the level of diversity that exists within the human race. Its like living in an ocean with each of  us being the only one of is kind. But amidst this insane diversity does run a common thread. There are everyday little things that strings together all of human race. Here goes my list: Words hurt more than broken bones. And such wounds take much longer to heal. Cancer is something that exists as a disease of the body as well as mind. Some thoughts, when left unattended, grow cancerous, kill. Love heals faster than the doctor. Leaves us stronger. Hatred infests deeper, lingers longer, manifests itself in unpredictable ways, and often is easier to nurture than love. Love is complicated. It can give way to hatred in a moment. Love is fragile, needs constant tending and protect

Let the frozen icicles from past Thaw for a moment in time Let the warmth of my surrender Give life to tender spring. I call for the roses to believe again I call for the wild flowers to sprout And the larks to find their songs anew I hold on to myself no more I am now one with you The white in me is now splattered With a million colors of you.

Life is mostly tiring. I have often looked out of train windows late into nights and seen trains hurtling past on the opposite tracks. It is one racket of streaking steel with lights forming long lines of lightning. I have wondered if some lonely wanderer like me would have been looking out of those windows as well, trying to make sense of this whirl of life. And amidst this terrible rush of everyday living, I have faced challenges that comes with the act of getting things done. Every decision I have had to ever take have come with a deadline. Either you take the decision within that time or the decision gets taken on its own. I am not sure which is better. Taking decisions or allowing life to take its own decisions. There is no data with me to prove that one is better than the other. However, I have always preferred taking decisions. Some augur well, while others are stuff about which stories of great failures can be written. I love it either ways. I love it when something works out a

Men's wallets are just as mysterious as those of women. Though smaller, they inturn have numerous pockets and pouches that are capable of safely tucking away many secrets. Mine is a leather wallet I go for a replacement every three or maybe four years. Every time I get myself a new wallet, the transfer of contents from the old one to the new is like a spiritual ceremony. First I empty all the contents of the existing wallet into a clean and empty table. Them comes the close scrutiny part. There are coins from Riyadh that my uncle gave when I was young, so they automatically gets into the new wallet. There are unclaimed bills from past expenses and hurriedly scribbled phone numbers, and then there are small notes or at times, a couple of lines from a poem that never had a name. All these go into the 'to be discarded' section. Photos of gods find space in the new wallet. So does all the plastic cards for credit debit insurance vehicle id voting reliance Spenser etc. All these

Raj, does heaven and hell exist? Yes Princess, it does. What is this between Hell and Fire? Why is hell always fiery? No idea baby, probably something to do with pain. I have heard that burns cause maximum pain. But Raj, how will you burn if you have no body, you are dead right? Hmm, good one. I have no answers Princess. Ok. Do you remember the time you were having this fling with that girl from office? Why bring it up now baby? No, I am just asking. Do you remember? I do. I used to be so jealous, my heart was a smouldering cinder. Do you understand what I mean? Yes baby. It was like hell for you. I love you Raj. So do I baby. Now you guess what I am thinking.... This is heaven Princess. Dog you are Raj. Bhou Bhou Princess.

If I could do a Neruda, You would have smelt of summer roses And Autumn pine. There would have been sheer love Of the kind that causes our hearts to ache And loneliness bordering the divine. You would have had so many secrets Welling up as in a girly giggle And so few friends who would hear them all. I am no Neruda I can't paint you a Summer breeze Amidst this long winter chill.

I go out into life each day I do on my masks, and I play Choose of me from the ones you like I am an actor, My worlds rarely collide.

Has anyone ever told you that you are almost impossible to manage? That you are grossly impossible of acting as if you had one normal cell in your body? You never tell me that you love me, you never wish me on my birthday and you never have time to take me out!! When was the last time you liked me on FB?, never! I have never heard you speak a gentle word to any adult. The only thing you are good at is your work and playing ghoda with the neighbors kids. Uff! Do you know how frustrating all this is to me? You should have been in Police. You don't have a heart. Why am I wasting my time, you are beyond listening as well! Are you there? I am. Is that aaaaaalllll you have to say? Twenty years and this is what you have to say: Aaaiiii Am? Did you as just say twenty? Yes goddammit. I have spent twenty years with you. Oh shit, I guess I am better than I thought! Thank you baby! ---------------- PS: Ghoda stands for Horse in Hindi.

Every time I close my eyes I see the green of Kerala countryside The dark greens of lumbering rubber trees The even tranquil green of silent paddy fields The light lemon yellow green from tender clover leaves  And then I remember your dupatta Deep red or possibly maroon Standing out among the Kerala countrysides.