Works of RK

I am sitting at this airport somewhere and I see a girl who looks quite like you. Something that she did caught my attention. She was almost as tall, almost as fair and her hair, it was just as straight and shiny. The way she looked into her bag for the boarding pass, the way she held her head high and her gait graceful and stately, reminded me of you. And then she looked at me, and the way she looked at me, I knew it could not be you. She did not look at me the way you look at me when you love me, nor when you hate me. Only you can look at me, the way you look at me. 

From the dead barks of our yesterday's, hardened with hurt and regret, scrawny with so much of scrounging, and flaky with all this neglect, we can still will for hope to bloom, faith to survive. And then sometimes, like a miracle, from the this stoic heart full of deadened despair, a new shoot will grow , you will never know.

What if I did not have this phone? Would I have so longingly stared into my empty spaces just as well? There are times when the noise of your silences, deafen me with its roar. It's almost as if an Ocean has come visiting a sea. I am home, and my home is missing me. I write, but my words are not me. I try to force meanings into memories, but my memories, they deceive me. How much of me over the years, have you taken away from me. And how I wish you would take away,  the little that remains as well. This ocean so desperately longs for its sea.

I call her once in a while, and make idle chatter until she brings up you. I don't want her to know, that I think about you. I think about you constantly; but she is important too. And when she talks to me about you, I feel like you are standing on the other side of this endless shoreline, watching me watching you. It's one more day of living without you.

I look at her and she reminds me so much of you. I know that she is another, but I like her not because of herself, but because of you. She looks into my eyes and find me staring at her all the time. Sometimes she asks me, why do you stare at me all the time? I am right here next to you, but you look at me as if you are seeing me for the first time, all the time! I look at her and I hear you asking me to stop staring at you. I look at her and hear you asking me to grow up. For her to live, independent of you, I have to let go of a part of me that lives with you. And whenever I have tried doing that, I have discovered that in losing you, I lose most of myself too. And whenever I have tried doing that, I have found in me a stranger who goes by some other name. I cannot have another name, for I have not answered to any other name than the one by which you called me, the last time you called me. Death may not bring a closure to that which this life could not sustain.

भागते हुए वक़्त से जब की हमने गिला यार जल्दी में क्यों रहते हो तुम इतनी इन सांसों की हलचल को थमने तो दो कुछ देर के लिए तो रुक जाओ जो बिछड़े हमारे तुम्हारे अघोष में हमें उन्हें ढूँढने तो दो। पलट बोला वक़्त ने मुझसे लौट न आएंगे वो तुम जिनके लौटने की आस लगाए बैठे हो। जिस धुंद से थे तुम गुज़रे रह गए कई तुम्हारे अपने वहीं ठहरे राह ताकते तुम्हारी बस तुम्हारी ही आस लिए। मैं था कहाँ बढ़ा हूँ तो मैं कबसे वहीँ खड़ा बढ़ तो तुम गए हो दोस्त मैं तो हूँ बस तुम्हारे पीछे पडा।

Once the cooking is done The dishes Stain free Stare sullenly  into the darkness That surrounds A kitchen awaiting it's master's Return.