Skip to main content

Tunnels in Time

Its my 36th birthday today. Like the dish that they never served, the movie scene they censored and the interview call that never came, I missed you in my life today. 


I have taken an inventory of those who blessed me today, and I have realized that for a generally unsociable moron like me, I have had too many loving souls wishing me. While I thank my maker for this day and the blessings, in this milieu... I miss you. If life were a journey through a tunnel in time, I am barely scraping through this part of my travels. I know that I will wake up with your thought throbbing in my head, like a migraine that wont fade; and I know that I will sleep with your thoughts running in my mind, like some virus that wont be deleted, cant be quarantined. Knowing that somewhere far away from me, your thoughts might too rest on thoughts of me  gives me no solace. I know that you miss me too.


Knowing you I have known that it is those whom we love most that we hurt most and are most hurt upon by. I wish it could be different. Now that this day is almost run, I look forward to those years to come, I look forward to your surviving in me as a memory as a pain as a wish. Happy Birthday to Me.
Labels:

Comments

  1. tarigDecember 27, 2010 at 5:27 AM

    Happy birthday

    ReplyDelete
  2. nothingprofoundDecember 27, 2010 at 9:30 PM

    Happy birthday! I hope this painful memory will mellow over the years as you find ever new joy and love in your life.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Long Winter Chill

If I could do a Neruda, You would have smelt of summer roses And Autumn pine. There would have been sheer love Of the kind that causes our hearts to ache And loneliness bordering the divine. You would have had so many secrets Welling up as in a girly giggle And so few friends who would hear them all. I am no Neruda I can't paint you a Summer breeze Amidst this long winter chill.
12 comments
Read more

That Fluttering of Broken Wings

If you were to cross the road and hurt your toe, I know that I will never know. As we go on to take different roads and move on across different shores, there is something that happens to our relationships. Something that estranges, disconnects, disintegrates. I know that you still think of me. I know this because I find myself thinking about you. And thoughts rarely get seeded on their own. It comes from you to I and from I to you until one of us is alive. Old relationships rarely die. Like broken winged moths, they hang around dark alleys of forgotten memory lanes. Ever so often, I can hear one of them flutter its wings. Not too close but never too far.
10 comments
Read more

Hush

You don't have to tell me. I just know. Its that little sniffle that comes through The unexplained pauses The slow responses I know when you call Just because you needed to cry.
8 comments
Read more