Works of RK

TWO SHADES TOO BLUE I watch the empty window-side table closely. For this used to be your favourite place. Here you would sip your half cup tea And pout and look out of the window longingly. You will point to people going about their everyday lives,  and like a little princess, you will weave stories, and chuckle and laugh Your presence had a way of making my little house Feel full. It was as if you filled my walls with shades That made then come to life. As if suddenly, Being a dining table was an important achievement, And that wall hanging Would acquire a personality, and indulgently Glare at me; as if this were its house, not mine. I now look at the empty space besides my window. Baby , it was your favourite spot. And watching you My favourite moment. First published in Muse India, Jan-Feb 2017

That constant pulse of missing That heightened anticipation of a change That would never come. I miss you so much That I could not even write these lines Until now For the fear that these lines will fail to tell The sadness that surrounds my soul And the emptiness that walks with me Reminding me Of just how much you will forever Mean to me. This shell of my being Is a soulless godless place And without you the colors fade As if they just gave up their shades Now that you are not looking. Its not your fragrance that I miss Its not the exquisite beauty of your being No I do not miss you The way people miss people. Baby, I miss your love. I miss your look. I miss you missing me.

I no longer live in your secret places.  I am aware that relationships change, perspectives change and so do people with it. But the heart wants what it wants. I look into your eyes and I don't see myself there anymore. You look at me and I know that you are not looking at me anymore. But the heart wants what it wants.

As you ride along long winding lanes of your life, And as you take each blind turn And live out its destiny; Remember my friend I too would have passed that way One car distance away, Taking those very same turns with you Ahead of you, For you. And if you ever feel lonely in the ride The seat next to me is empty And I would love you by my side. ------------ Inspired by NFS-The Movie,

Every once in a long while, I fall silent in midst of a roaring relationship. I wait for the clutter of last night chatter to subside and the noise from everyday thoughts to settle down, and then I watch how my withdrawing affects the relationship. Most times, the silence stretches uneasily. It is as if somebody has paused a Schwarzenegger movie. It is as if an icicle forgot to drip, a snowflake landed on another and I were in a dream where the bogey man scared me to silence.

I have never seen an ocean. I don't know anyone who has seen one. Growing up by the Ganges, I was in awe with the angry river that overflowed every year. I looked at Baccha uncle's marooned steamer and imagined the ghosts that lived within its iron soul. When I first saw the sea, I also sensed the roundness of the horizon, the fullness of its brims and the infiniteness of the waves. If I were to sing on a dark silent night, l knew that my song would not reach the other shore. The sea dwarfed me into nothingness. It made me feel like a handful of water held up to the sun as an offering and then running down the fingers, back into the sea. Like an errant stream, I run a crazy winding course downhill. But my dear, I know that when I am done, I will meander my way back to you. I can feel my rush as I fall into you. I know what awaits me, as I dive deep into you. I too, fill you. I loose myself so that there can be you.

I see the vastness of these oceans and I look at my bare foot legs, wet with the oceans longing for me. Not that I waded into these waters deliberately, not that I heard it's call and responded as in a dream. These waters came searching for me. As the showers spray salt shatter break breach surf and roll, I feel like the sea, rushing to lose myself among the vastness that now surrounds me. It is time to lose a bit of me. It is time to change a bit of you. Of what use my dear are these two separate identities?

जो रिश्ता समंदर का पानी से लहरों का किनारों से है कुछ ऐसा ही रिश्ता मेरी हमनफ़ज़ आपके दिल का हमारे दिल से है। कभी इतनी पास की रूहानी हो जाये कभी दूर इतनी कि रूह तड़प सा जाये। कभी तुम्हारे आघोष में वक़्त यूँ ही निकल जाये तो कभी बिछडन कि आग हमें निगल जाये। सुनो, जब कभी समुन्दर की लहरें बूंदे बन तुम्हारे बदन को सेहराये उन्हें झटकना मत, कुछ देर और भिगोने देना क्या खबर मेरी हमनशीं तुम्हारे कदम लौट मेरी और फिर कब आये।

धर्ति से ना पूछो कि है बारिश से ये कैसा प्रेम वक़्त से ना पूछो क्षण का प्रेम तुम इस कदर हो घुली मुझमें जैसे कि तुम वक़्त और में क्षण तुममे तुम भूमी में जल सा समाया तुममे तुम मंज़िल मैं पथ सा तुममे तुम वाणी मैं भाषा तुममे में वो कहानी तुम परियों की रानी जिसमें।

I have felt your heart fluttering as my fingers made weird random design on your palm. No, you don't have to tell me what I do to you. It's just a small bit of all that you do to me as well.